Seeing Your Reflection in His Eyes!

Tonight I had the privilege to hear Jason Upton speak at our UnChapel here at Regent University. I don't get on campus much; however, I always cease the opportunity too when Jason comes. He comes bearing heavy words to challenge my heart and lunges me into the deeper pursuit of the one who created me. 

Tonight was no different. His words pierced my heart, and actually God spoke the same word he spoke through a young girl before he even spoke. For some reason emotions were high for me tonight. I would like to blame it on over exhaustion from being a mommy of two babies and being in school, but thats the norm of my life. Tonight the emotions seem to be more God lead.  Sometimes when I am in His presence thats all I can do, is weep.  Its almost cleansing for me and allows me to release all the burdens I've been holding inside! 

Anyways, as the young girl spoke about Hagar, the maid servant to Abraham who bore his first son. She reminded us of how God never forgot about her. Although it seemed she was forgotten, God still met her in the desert and provided for her and her child. And as she spoke those words. The tears began.  I wasn't feeling forgotten. Or at least I didn't think I was, until that moment God just decided or well, knew, I needed a little love tonight.  I felt it.  He whispered gently in my ears, "I see it all. I see all who you are as a mother, and all that you give as a person. Your still you, and YOU are the one I love." 

I learned tonight that in order for me to truly love myself, and most importantly my children, I need to understand the depth of the Fathers love for me.  He created me to be a true representation of the His kingdom! And no this does not entail some HUGE ministry endeavor that will make me a better Christian in the eyes of the church, but just being Amber. The Amber he created. Not painted or designed to meet someone else's expectations, but designed perfectly the way God made me.

In that moment, my heart was lightened, and my soul rejuvenated. God saw my need, and he filled it. 

I walked away tonight feeling better about who I am, all because I saw myself in the REFLECTION of HIS EYES.  

Thank you Jesus for loving me, just for me. And most importantly showing me the true beauty in just being!